Updated: Jun 17, 2019
One of the things I want to make sure people know is that there will be ups and downs in the process. Last Thursday my mom called me to tell me that she was very upset because someone she had never seen before came to wake her up in the morning. She was scared of course because when you are 79 and you open your eyes first thing in the morning to someone sanding over you that you do not know it is startling I imagine. Especially when you can't get up yourself or use your hands or legs much.
The women said she was new and was there to get her up. She was not very pleasant about it either according to my mom. My mom told her she did not know who she was and that she was not getting up with her and would wait for her usually person or at least someone she knew.
The women got mad and left. The regular women eventually came in and as kind as she normally is she was a little frustrated and was not able to hide it. My mom felt bad that she was upset and obviously overwhelmed with the morning. They must have been short staffed yet again:) I understand my mom feeling bad for her usual caregiver but when I told her I was going to talk to them she got afraid that the caregiver would get in trouble and not be nice to her anymore.
This is the thing I find the most frustrating. Nobody should feel afraid of people in a facility. Not only is that their job to be kind and care for her but we pay and incredible amount of money for it.
I did send an email out to all 4 managers and the executive director very kindly explaining what happened and suggesting to them that they should always introduce a new caregiver to someone before they will be caring for them. I also explained how scary it must be for someone to have no control and not know who is standing over them. I also made sure to let them know how much I appreciate the difficulty of the job and that I know they do their best. I always try and be supportive when I have concerns. I know that these people have a difficult job day after day.
Fast forward to today... I have emailed them now 3 times with not one reply back from anyone until last night. The executive director replied back that one of them is on vacation and the others have been very busy. She said she would talk to them. I have several issues with the way this was handled but the lack of communication is the worst part. You can't have residents and families who reach out with a concern and get no response for four days. Senior care is a 24/7 job. If one of five people was unable to reply to me there is a problem in the system. Lack of communication with families and residents is the number one thing that causes problems. It is not the problems themselves.
The lesson is that it can wear you down but you have to stay on it. Don't be afraid to speak up and let them know when something is not handled the right way.